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Jaws Reunion

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Jaws Reunion

Enjoyed another viewing of Jaws during Shark Week and now watching a “making of” Jaws documentary, so I was compelled to bring this one out of the archives and give it a touch-up.

Annoying French Toast

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Annoying French Toast

Yes, but don’t forget that English muffins can get quite snooty.

Cat Entrepreneur

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Cat Entrepreneur

I refuse to pay more than $4.50 for that service.

Eight Wasted Lives

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Eight Wasted Lives

Eight Wasted Lives?? We all know that watching TV is NEVER a waste of time.

Dog Cheese

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Dog Cheese

Sometimes the simplest ideas are the most ingenious ideas.

Polite Pooch

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Polite Pooch

Is there anything dogs won’t do in the service of humans?

Space Farce

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Space Farce

Are you relieved he won’t be probing Uranus?

Observant Aliens

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Observant Aliens

They would have high-tailed it out of here even faster had they landed in Washington, D.C.

Space Jobs Available

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Space Jobs Available

The Space Force job fair provides complementary Tang.

Wine and Swine

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Wine and Swine

But in fairness to him, it’s a classy tank top.

Willing to Flip

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Willing to Flip

Yep, that’s all it takes. Wave a tasty treat in front of the pooch’s snout and say “SPEAK!”

Beaver in Repose

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Beaver in Repose

I’m proud and excited to unveil Portrait No. 1 in the Captain Scratchy Official Portrait Series. These portraits were painstakingly created using oils on canvas. (That’s a lie.)

Horse Reclining

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Horse Reclining

It wasn’t easy to get him to pose for this portrait. But once he settled into the recliner, he struck a dignified, contemplative pose.

Bear Contemplating Toast

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Bear Contemplating Toast

This one falls into the “Still Life” category because he stood there contemplating making toast for several days.

My First Venn Diagram

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My First Venn Diagram

Calling my local library to reserve Venn Diagrams for Dummies.

Beach Bummer

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Beach Bummer

All it takes is a little creativity to remedy your end-of-summer bummer.

Delicious Future Advice

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Delicious Future Advice

Future versions of us are so darn wise.

Bad at Standup

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Bad at Standup

Heckling a dog is never cool, even if the jokes are lame.

Grape Nuts

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Grape Nuts

Based on a true story.

Cheese King

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Cheese King

It’s not right that servers who sprinkle fresh Parmesan on your pasta always say, “Say when”, but they never say, “Say where.” Maybe I’d like some fresh Parmesan sprinkled on my elbows.
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